Blog #2 – David Goetz – “Suburban Addictions”

Of all the presenters throughout the conference, David Goetz was by the far the most impacting to me.  David has recently written a book that is by far the most eye-opening, down to earth, honest analysis of life in the suburbs (small towns) and the implications of that life on spirituality.  Check it out sometime.  The title is Death By Suburb: How to Keep the Suburbs from Killing Your Soul.

David’s book fleshes out eight things that bombard the residents of suburbia.  I will not list those things out of fairness to Dave and because it would be much better for you to read and discover those on your own.  At the conference, however, he hit upon three major addictions in the life of the average suburban resident.

1. Suburbanites are obsessed with the success of their children.

2. Suburbanites are consumed with their neighbor’s life.

3. Suburbanites are fixated on the speed of their lives.

The reality of these three forces, if you will, in our lives is that we end up living very bloated lives obsessed with getting ourselves ahead, being successful, appearing like we have it all together.  The bloat is too much of one thing and too little of everything else.

I’m not talking about finding time for church.  Rather, I’m talking about being the church within time.  How has the drive to be as efficient as possible deterred the growth of healthy families?  What if the lack of time for intimacy has left spouses as hollow shells of their once committed selves, hollow shells that soon shatter with the reality of divorce?

The painful truth of this suburban “paradise” of a picket fence, a golden retriever named “Theodore” or “Theo” for short, two kids, nice, big vehicles, plenty of spare cash to spend at the movies.  This style of living appeals to many of us.  Suburbia isn’t popular because it causes people to suffer.  Suburbia is popular because it anesthetizes us.  It lulls us into false senses of security.  Our “gods” are satisfied.  We have a flat-screen television, we have a beautifully cut lawn.

The enemy of suburbia is the “wantingness” of humanity.  If Mr. John Jacobs has a new SUV then my minivan doesn’t look so hip anymore.  If she can afford those kinds of clothes then I need to buy something better to not only match her fashion move in this game of clothing poker but to up the ante a little bit.  If she spends $35 for a shirt I will find one a little more expensive in the hopes of being a little more unique.

The problem: uniqueness in suburbia is only an illusion.  The only thing unique about most teenagers is the inseam of their jeans.  The brand is the same as 50 other students living on the same block.  The only unique thing about that person’s car are the people it’s hauling.  Buy a new car sometime and just see how INSTANTLY you see that same car everywhere.  We’re not unique…there is nothing individual about our individualistic culture.  It’s all vanity and we have bought into the lie and pay homage to the gods of consumerism every day.

So, what’s to be our response?  Goetz uttered three words that have haunted me, my closest friends, and the community of faith I call home for some time, we must “die to self.”  One way to solve a bloating problem is to stop eating or drinking that which is bloating you.

Goetz contends that the Protestant church has been especially great at creating beginners on the Christian journey.  The only problem, you cannot program converts and you cannot program spiritual transitions.  The deeper (thicker as he calls it) life is not a mere three programs away.

Transitions on the spiritual journey involve suffering and prayer.  These things, however have no consumer appeal.  People do not flood churches for a Wii when it involves losing their family members, becoming disowned by a social group, giving up straight A’s to become a beacon of hope to your neighborhood, going to community college instead of an Ivy League school.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote in his book, The Cost of Discipleship, “When Christ calls a man, he bids him come and die.”  Jesus had to die, His followers had to die, we must die to experience the fullness of the Kingdom.

Jesus’ death seemed like the end but, in reality, it was the beginning.  Only through His death were we granted true life, abundant life.  But Jesus is not a gateway to inner bliss.  Instead, Jesus is a model of what all of us must do to experience life.  Paul wrote to the church in Galatia, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live but Christ lives in me.  The life I live in the body I live by faith in the son of God who loved me gave himself for me” (2:20).

Before we go any further, dying here ultimately means physical death.  But for us now, death implies dying to all those things that we find identity, security, hope and love in other than Christ.  We’re talking about dying to self.  Even though there is something about dying to self that fully brings us alive, it is a difficult journey for it goes against every fiber of our being.  We avoid dying to self because dying to self requires the greatest amount of faith in God, namely, that He is able to bring us back to life AND that the life He offers is really the best offer on the table.  We so desperately want to live because we have not allowed for the evidence of God’s unending love and immense provision to sweep into our lives.

Just read the following scriptures and hear the call to lose control and give it to God:

• “Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.” (Matthew 10:39, TNIV)
• “You are not your own; you were bought at a price.  Therefore honor God with your body.” (1 Corinthians 6:19-20, NIV)
• “Then Jesus said to his disciples: ‘Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear.  Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes.  Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them.  And how much more valuable you are than birds!  Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?  Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?’” (Luke 12:22-26, NIV)
• “Listen carefully: Unless a grain of wheat is buried in the ground, dead to the world, it is never anymore than a grain of wheat.  But if it is buried, it sprouts and reproduces itself many times over.  In the same way, anyone who holds on to life just as it  is destroys life.  But if you let it go, reckless in your love, you’ll have it forever, real and eternal.” (John 12:24, The Message)

The dilemma of Protestant Christianity, Goetz argues, is that believers are living in a perpetual state of Christianity.  The call to transition to the deeper end of the spiritual pool is one that calls us to lose control.  For churches to transition to the deeper side of life they need to begin thinking in terms of spirituality and move away from the thought process of ideas fleshed out in programs.There is no way to get deeper with Christ without suffering and prayer.  There is no consumeristic appeal to come to these.  Ultimately, in light of Bonhoeffer’s quote above, there is really no consumeristic appeal to the Gospel.  Dying is ultimately giving up control.  For the suburbanite (and small town resident I would argue) this is counter-cultural to the well-groomed, carefully maintained, life under control existence to which we’ve become accustomed.

Tags: Q Conference

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